Downton Abbey

You know if I like something that it is no longer a fringe concept. I seem to only jump on bandwagons once they have got rolling and they are ready to roll out of town.  Maybe it’s smart. I’m waiting to see what the mainstream of society thinks about a particular trend - the people of the world are my test subjects, and I will not become part of a popular activity/idea/movement unless it has been proven to be funny, to not cause cancer, and certainly not until there is extensive tie-in merchandising.

Which brings me to Downton Abbey, of course.

My friend Sarah, who keeps me in the know about all things British cozy/period drama/ways of cooking with soda pop, told me a very long time ago that there was a show I should watch called Downton Abbey, that I would love it. I said, I will get on that, dear friend, because I know you’ve never directed me falsely. 

Two years later...

Oh my God, I love Downton Abbey!

And so does the rest of the sentient world, apparently.

What is it about this show that makes me swoon with gender stereotypical rapture? The utter romance of star crossed lovers Mary and Matthew? The tension of the pure and true love between Mr. Bates and Anna. The sweetness of waiting for the big-time come-uppance that must befall Thomas and  O’Brien? Does anyone know where they poop? We haven’t seen that yet, have we. With so much attention to historical detail, you’d think they’d show us the most important room in the house/yard.

Is it the simplicity of living according to strict rules that might be inconvenient, but also make it so much easier to plan one’s day? 

There is something of a social class tourism in it. There is the voyeurism of peeping into the peerage. I think it’s a kind of classy Real Housewives of the Blah Blah Blah, only Downton Abbey is Real Gentry of the British Countryside. Instead of wine thrown in faces, you get cold shoulders, which has a much greater impact, I think. You can’t rinse out disdain.

And the lives of the staff has something appealing about it. Although they work long hours for little recognition, there is a sense of family and loyalty that gives purpose and dignity to their lives, even if those beliefs may or may not be justified.

i just can’t decide who I want to be, Anna or Mary. Mary is strong, yet simpering. Anna is strong and principled, yet doesn’t get to wear those awesome dresses that the “upstairs” gals do.  How to chose, how to chose?

 And who doesn’t love The Dowager Countess (I wonder if Maggie Smith wearies of hearing herself being referred to as “a treasure”?). I even started a needlepoint portrait of Our Favourite Countess of the One Liners. But I made a mistake and used the totally wrong colour for her skin tone and she looks like The Zombie Dowager Countess. 

Hilarious, but not what I had in mind.

Downton Abbey does romanticize the past a fair bit. Things are much better today. I mean, if the son of a Turkish diplomat died in my sex-time bed, I mean, I would be telling EVERYONE.

Yah, fellas, I’m THAT good.

As it is, no one dies in my sex-time bed, although Brian has told me on many occasions that I am making him die inside. Which is kind of the same, right?

It’s my soap opera, and I love it. The only difference is that we have to wait months and months to find out what happens next. Apparently it’s in production now for release in the UK in Sept and then in on PBS in January of 2013. These Brits are like crack dealers. They get us hooked and then they make us wait and beg and cry. And then, after 6 amazing episodes, the show disappears. Why can’t they be like American television where a series is beaten to death and you just want it to stop because it’s like watching a fly spinning on it’s back in a puddle of water. Just die already, CSI. It will be so much easier for everyone.

So wait I shall, like the rest of the world, for the return of our favourite period drama. Not to be confused with the period drama I have on a less and less regular basis, but used to be once a month or so. And British television series, like my own period - well you never know when they’ll show up or how long they’ll last or how many people will get slapped because of it. Long live Anna and Mr. Bates!

Alphabet of Awesome

There’s nothing like a good night’s sleep followed by an excellent poop that makes you feel gratitude shimmer through your veins. 

I don’t want to go all Oprah on you, but I’d like to offer up a list of just a fraction of the things that I love and for which I am grateful. It is not exhaustive, at all!

To make it a less obvious vomit of narcissistic glee, let’s do it in alphabet form!

______________________________________________________________________________

A: Arrested Development. Movie is in the works (they actually made a statement about it, so it’s GOT to happen for sure, right?)

B: Brian: Good looking, patient, hilarious, smartiepants, undemanding, sexy, gassy.

  


C: Cauliflower. I think it’s my favourite vegetable. It’s so brain-like.

D: Downton Abbey. Don’t get me started. Future entire blog posts will be devoted to this show. If you haven’t seen it yet, find it, watch both seasons (plus the Christmas bonus episode) and let’s talk.

E: E-Books. I still like regular books, but there’s something magic about wanting a book and being able to have it in seconds. There’s also something potentially financially disastrous about it, too.

F: Fiona. My cat is effing awesome

G: Geico ads. Like these:

H: My House. It keeps me from being homeless. 

I: Intellectuals. I love listening to smart people talk. I don’t usually contribute much to those conversations much, but I’m highly entertained by them.  Graham could discuss topics ranging from Keats to Buffy. And then tie them together at the end. Kevin explained to me once why old flower water smells so bad. And then he wrote a couple best sellers. My friend Lisa used to explain art to me. Her brain is so big, she has a wagon that she pulls behind her with her head on it. 

J. Jam. It’s tasty.

K: My Kitchen. It’s full of stuff.

L: Librarians. They know stuff.

M: Mornings. I like the quiet. 

N: Nina. Saves my life 5 days a week.

O:  Orangutan. Orange ones.

http://homepage.mac.com/wildlifeweb/primate/new/Grundmann/orangutan.html

P:  Puppets. I’d communicate with people better if we could do it through puppets and funny voices. 

Q: Qi. Best, most convenient scrabble word ever.

R: Ryan. Because he rocks. I also like regularity.

S: Stitching. Stitching is super.

T: Television. Obviously. 

U: Underwear. It’s keeps me from being a whore.

V: Voldemort. He just needed a little love.

W: Warmness. I like being warm.

X: X-rays, I guess. I mean, not much to choose from. Xylophones are fine, but I’m not, like, grateful for them. I mean, when was the last time a xylophone found a cancerous tumor early and saved a life. Stupid xylophones. Never thinking of anyone but themselves.

Y: Yoka. I spend all of my money there. All of it. They see me coming and they immediately call their investment advisors: “She’s coming in, Dennis, what looks good today?”

Z: Zinc. You need it to live.

What do you think is awesome? Pick a letter. Any letter!